The Psychedelic Diaries, Vol I: When you journey inward

Ray Christian
2 min readApr 8, 2021

“One mark of a great mind is a willingness to change it”

— Walter Isaacson

Free version of the article is available here

This series chronicles monthly macrodosing — full-dose, intentional psychedelic therapy sessions — over a five year period. We’ll cover the challenges, preparation, and overall impact.

The Psychedelic Diaries

Like most great stories, this one starts with a girl.

Her name was Melanie and I had a longstanding crush. She had charm, beauty, and a disarming personality.

Unfortunately, she had a boyfriend.

I met him at a posh Sunset Blvd lounge in Los Angeles at my sister’s birthday party.

After 2 minutes of small talk, it became clear: I was outclassed.

He was intelligent, genuine, and successful.

Before I could even process the hit to my ego, he inexplicably reaches in his pocket, pulls out a handful of mushrooms, and hands them to me.

I was incredulous, intrigued, and soon found out that Melanie was also engaging in psychedelic sessions.

So, in a misguided attempt to keep up with the joneses, I began searching for mushrooms.

Venturing inward

It all changed with my first intentional psychedelic therapy session.

I had done recreational psilocybin a few times as a young adult but never in an intentional setting.

After a dozen dormant years, I dove back into the psychedelic world with a couple friends.

It was ostensibly another recreational session, like the previous experiences. However, out of sheer luck, I ended up breaking away from the group and spending time alone.

Instead of enjoying the laughs, visuals & absurd novelty, for the first time in my life a psychedelic compound took me inward.

That experience changed everything.

A new path

Something profound happened and I wanted more.

I began experimenting on myself like Sasha Shulgin with full-dose intentional sessions every month. Many were alone, many with others, many guiding others.

A strange and audacious gesture from Melanie’s boyfriend led to a major demarcation point in my life.

My health improved, career took off, and I found deep sense of purpose.

These Psychedelic Diaries will detail the experience.

See Volume II here: Seven types of profound trips



Ray Christian

Innovator, designer, strategist, public speaker, psychonaut. Engaged in a love affair with cutting-edge mental healthcare, AI, & psychedelics